Fwordz

As I get ready for my next appointment today at Levine Cancer Institute I keep thinking about all the thoughts I had on my bike ride yesterday.  I started training for the 24 hours of booty at the end of July and the ride brought up things I thought should be shared to give people an insight into what it's like to be a cancer survivor and also someone like me (Cowden Syndrome).  Just because I've had the surgery and don't have to have treatment this time doesn't mean it just goes away.  1.  Doctor's appointments .  Just in June alone I've had 5 and have two more that I know of in July, this could change.  But every time I know one is coming up or I have one there is always the thought of what are they going to find now, a kind of holding my breath.  Now please understand this does not mean I live in constant fear but imagine having to go to the cancer center that many times in one month, it will mess with your mind a little.  And...

PSA:  If you don't have a sense of humor then you may get offended with some of the things that I say in this post.   Here I am 2.5 weeks post surgery, post follow up visits and the best outcome for this bout with cancer yet I still can't seem to sigh a sigh of relief.  I'm not sure I will be able to.  I really thought after the surgery and follow up visit I was going to be done with this oncologist.  Turns out that's not the case.  When I went in for the follow up I said so I'm done with you but do I have to still see my gynecologist?  Valid question, right?  His response was "why, you don't want to see me again??" to which I responded "well it's not like I do reoccurrence I dance with new cancers"(I don't have anything left so that's why I asked).  We all laughed but it was he who had the last laugh because turns out my chances of reoccurrence are elevated because of a syndrome I have (we will get to this).  I get to ...